Goodbye my angel, till we meet again.

 Its been years since I've blogged(a recurring theme on my blog), but this feels like something I truly want to pen down.

I lost my angel, that's f'ing painful but holy hell. I'm glad I got to sorta meet you, feel you for the short short short time frame. 

I know in my gut, deep down you're a beautiful being, a feminine being. More feminine than I could ever be. You made me feel different, not me one bit. 

You made me exhausted, hungry with barely any appetite, made my back feel all sorts of pain, cranky, happier than ever, excited for life. 

How I wish I got to hold you, feel your kicks, get excited at doctors appointments, would you be an introvert or an extrovert, feel the warmth of your skin, would you have looked like D or me or a perfect mix of the both of us, would you have played  music or dance or something completely far off from us. 

So many would have could have what if's has crossed my mind

I have so many questions but I've come to terms with my current reality. I'm happy to have "met" you, I will promise to continue loving you till the end of time. I truly can't wait for the day i met you

I love you lil one.